The Lord came to
Noah in Canada in 1999. Same old story: Earth was wicked, and
Noah was to rebuild the ark and save two of every living thing,
along with a few good humans.
"Here's the
blueprint," said the Lord. "hurry - in six months I
start the rain."
Six months later, the rain started. The Lord saw Noah weeping in his yard - and no ark.
"Noah"
he roared, "where's my ark?"
"Forgive me
God," begged Noah. "Things have changed. I needed a
building permit from the city. I've been arguing with the
inspector about the need for a sprinkler system. My neighbours
claimed that I violated the neighbourhood zoning by building the
ark in my yard. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for
a decision. Getting wood was a problem. There's a ban on cutting
trees to save the spotted owl. I tried to convince the
environmentalists I needed the wood to save the owls. But, no go.
I gathered the animals, but got sued by animal rights groups.
They insisted I take more than two of each kind.
Last Modified: 1st December 2003